DAY 1

I survived Day 1 back at work. It was tough, but I got through it and today was a little easier. My day went something like this:  I woke up early to shower and get ready before Annabelle rose so I could maximize my hour and half of morning play with her. I was feeling all mentally strong until our nanny arrived. Then I got sad. Saying goodbye was super hard. Annabelle was sitting on her mat smiling up at me with those rosy cheeks and my heart just broke. I left quickly, because I knew if I dragged it out, I would really loose it. I was thankful that the morning air was chilly and felt good against my hot teary face.  I gained some composure as I walked to the train.

I had forgotten what it was like taking the morning commute during rush hour. Yuck! I found myself shoving myself and my not-so-stylish Medela Pump N' Style against complete strangers attempting to get on the F train before the doors shut. Man, that thing is heavy and awkward to lug around. I guess I will have to get used to it.  I was still a bit fragile upon arrival to my office and had a few tears when I saw my boss, but soon enough I was feeling a bit like the old Cathi. I had to spend an hour on the phone with IT getting my computer login figured out only to find 2,800 emails in my inbox! Many were junk mail, but still! Also, the girl whose job I am replacing sat in my office for over 5 years, so there is a ton of stuff to sort through and trash. I think she saved everything! There are boxes upon boxes of gift with purchase bags, competitive product and so much literature. I am fortunate that everyone seemed pretty understanding and mostly just stopped by to say hi and ask about A. By the end of the day I was in a groove, though I have a lot to catch up on and a lot to learn.  I will be shadowing the current Haircare Sr. Manager for the next two weeks, which will be nice to help me transition and get into the swing of things again.

I left a little early at about 4:45 and I arrived home to find Annabelle all smiles. It seems like she had a good day. She went to the park and story hour. I took my time putting her to bed tonight, giving her 6 stories, extra rocking, a few songs and some good old fashioned breast milk. She is going to be one spoiled girl due to her mom's guilt.  It is strange how I can get into a project and be working, yet my mind is wondering what our girl is up to.  Is she napping, laughing, eating?  I already miss my days at home with her and am counting down until the weekend.

MONDAY, MONDAY

Today marks my last day of "official" maternity leave.  What I mean by that is, it is the last normal weekday I have before going back a week from today.  Tomorrow morning we leave for California to celebrate Thanksgiving at Diane and Michael's.  We are very much looking forward to our annual visit up to Petaluma. Can't wait to spend time with the family and relax on the homestead.  Although Annabelle has already taken the flight to Cali three times since she was born, I am anticipating this flight may be differnt.  In the last month or so, she has become so much more alert.  She is a wiggle worm that still loves to stand when we hold her, but has now been mastering sitting by herself.  She has gone from being quite serious, to a really smiley baby and has been testing out those vocal chords.  She continues with her ah's, oh's and om's, but also has added some teradacto "dinasaur-like" shrieks to the mix.  Should be interesting on the flight.  I can hear a bit of a cough brewing in her chest, and her forehead feels a bit hot.  Hopefully this won't develop into anything serious before we leave. 

Aside from packing, we are going to enjoy this last beautiful Monday, in the same fashion we have for the last 6 months.  We will hit up our mama/baby yoga class in the morning and then go to our West Village Parents Playgroup in the afternoon.  Our Monday playgroup has been such a blessing to me.  I have met so many great moms that I know I will keep in close contact with long after returning to my desk on 5th Ave.  It is a gorgeous sunny day today and I am loving every minute of it!

GRAY DAYS

Last night a rain storm swept through the city removing most of the remaining leaves from their branches.  From my bedroom window I look down at the soggy sidewalks covered in fleck of gold, yellow and orange.  The branches are almost barren, looking skeletal and gray, matching my mood.  It is hard to believe that almost six months has gone by from when I looked out the same window holding my newborn baby and the leaves were newly spouted and a brilliant green.  It is as if the seasons know that my time at home with Annabelle is almost over.

Today I trained our nanny and it was harder than I expected.  Not so much the physical training, but watching someone else do with Annabelle the daily things I hold so dear.  I am already worried.  Will our nanny be good enough?  Will she sing to her and make her laugh?  Will she spend time with her teaching her colors and shapes?  Will she read to her, and encourage her to love books?  Will she play with her on the floor and make sure she gets strong?  Will she love her and keep her safe?  I am sure she will, though not the same way I do.  Tonight as I rocked Annabelle to sleep for her evening nap, I held her much longer than usual after she drifted off.  How much I love those sleepy eyes, her little breath, the way her tiny body curls around me.  How fast the time has gone.  How I would love to have those same six months all over again.  So far I am not a fan of the gray days.

SWINGERS

A few days ago two of mommy friends and I were discussing the next phase of entertainment for our 5-month-olds.  All three of us vowed when we were pregnant that we would not let our apartments turn into romper rooms with terrible plastic monstrosities that light up and play music.  Given our limited living quarters - "we just didn't have the space." I remember discussing with Dion (my more experienced mommy best friend), and claiming we wouldn't get a swing or an activity gym - out of the question!

Well, since the kiddos have arrived, all three of us have folded.  The first night Annabelle wouldn't go down to sleep, Nathan and I purchased a Fisher Price swing the very next day.  Yucky plastic-y piece #1, followed by an exersaucer, and a doorway jumper. I am foreseeing a Barbie Dream House in our future.  Dion, you were absolutely right.  The babes need to entertained, and we need somewhere to put them. When guests now enter the Ellis apartment, they may mistake it for Gymboree.  Pre-baby, my friend Maureen, thought this was the ideal swing for their apartment.  Minimalistic, modern, and simple.  Love it.  We both agreed, however, it will not be as fun as a plastic monstrosity that lights up and plays music.  Hmmm.

 Another great apartment swing - check out this cool trapeze swing seen on Cup of Jo.

 

That said, Annabelle has reached a new milestone and now goes on swings at the park.  At first she didn't know what to make of it, but now she seems to love the cool breeze in her face (soon to be cold breeze) and smiles as she swings back and forth.  Such a big girl.

HINTS OF HOLIDAYS

Yesterday I received my December issue of Real Simple Magazine in the mail and as I thumbed through the pages I could feel familiar stirring of excitement and anticipation of the upcoming Holidays.  It is still two weeks until Thanksgiving and already I am plotting out what I want to bake, the yarn wreath I want to craft for our front door, choosing a family Christmas card, knitting some homemade gifts and enjoying the transformation New York goes through during the Holidays.  This morning on NPR I heard the Christmas tree will be delivered via crane to Rockefeller Center today and already Christmas lights are sprouting up store windows and in the trees around town.  I love the thoughtfulness the Holidays brings - reflecting on the passing year, relishing traditions, and treasuring loved ones.  I am most looking forward to celebrating Annie E's first Christmas and spending time with friends and family.  Having a child brings a whole new meaning to Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's.  I look forward sharing everything I enjoyed about the Holidays as a child with Annabelle.  When I was small I assumed everyone had a similar Holiday experience to mine.  When I moved away from home, I realized that was not the case - not even close.  I appreciate so much how my mom goes to so much trouble every year to make the Holidays so special for us kids.  I know she would say she loves doing it, but it truly is tremendous the amount of love and tradition that is poured into the baking, the decorating, the music, and the stories each year.  It is because of her, I too, love getting in the spirit.  Living so far from home I miss pulling out the boxes of decorations with the family, stringing up the lights and all of the preparation, that is mostly about spending time together rather than making the home festive, though that is the spectacular result!

One of the features in Real Simple was about looking at the Holidays Through Another Lens.  Eight artists documented in photos where they have found inspiration in this beautiful season.  One photographer, Nicholas McElroy, submitted the following photo.  He took it during winter break during college.  Every year he would drive from Santa Fe (where he attended school) to his parents' house in Seattle. This particular photo was captured on a desolate stretch of road in southern Utah during the journey.  He said, "I couldn't resist jumping out to experience the sense of total silence you get in such a remote location and to observe the way the weather made the sky and earth blend together.  I didn't linger too long, however, since I  couldn't wait to get home to see family and friends." I know the feeling!  Aside from being a great pic, this photo grabbed my attention because my dad has a similar Volvo that has been in the family since the 60's.  We grew up hearing stories of the "snow Volvo" and I imagine it looking somewhat like this.  Dad, this one's for you!

NAPS

Naps are still a bit of a mystery in our house.  Annabelle still takes 3-4 naps a day however when they will occur varies. One of the many joys about nap time is going in to get her out of her crib when she wakes.  As soon as she notices you in the room, her face lights up with the biggest grin and her little feet start kicking with excitement.  Can't beat it :)

ANOTHER BIRTHDAY!

Another Birthday just snuck up on me!  Wishing my little brother, Jamie, a very happy birthday.  Hope this year is filled with love and happiness. Here is an oldie but goodie...(the pic, not you!)

SNUG AS A BUG

The temperature is rapidly dropping on the East Coast.  We have found one of the best ways to tote Annie E around the city while keeping her warm is inside dad's puffy North Face jacket.  Here is a pic from Halloween night.  Snug as a bug!

ITSY BITSY

Since Annabelle was about 8 weeks old we have been hitting up a mom/baby yoga class at Karma Kids Yoga.  She seems to love it and I even get a tiny bit of a workout.  One of the songs we sing in the class is the yogi version of the Itsy Bitsy Spider which I think is pretty cute.  For little ones like my nephew, Hunter, who love the traditional Itsy Bitsy Spider, this makes the perfect second verse to keep the smiles going.

The itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout.
(climbing spider hands)
To ask the great big universe what life was all about.
(palms up at shoulders)
The stars in the sky said everything was great.
 (flicking fingers like little starbursts overhead)
So the itsy bitsy spider went OM
(namaste hands overhead)
to meditate.
(elbows on knees palms up)

ROSEBROOK MEYER

True to my love of fine stationary, I am relishing the brand new collection of wedding stationary designed by one of my West Village mommy friends, Maureen, and her business partner, Ashley.  They recently launched their website and it looks just gorgeous: rosebrookmeyer.com.  Their typography-focused designs are clean and elegant and overall just stunning.   I highly recommend to any bride-to-be!